You Can't Keep Me Down!!

When they found my tangerine sized tumor resting on my brain, putting pressure on the brain, they wouldn't allow me to go back home. They sent me straight to UVA, no passing go, no collecting $200 dollars. I have to admit, I had no idea just how big the tumor was at this time. My doctors had shared it with Terry, my husband, but not with me, at least I didn't remember it if they did. Don't get me wrong . . the doctors had said that it was a large tumor, large to me was the size of a dime, a nickle at the largest. It wasn't until afterwards they would tell me just how big it was.

My surgery, yes, I said surgery, was set for February 14th, 2012. I carefully talked to the doctors about this procedure. I wanted to make sure that it wouldn't affect who I was and there wasn't going to be any adverse affects in a reasonable percentage of these cases. Then again, my case has always been new and exciting anyway, don't know what I was thinking then. Anyway . . . the tumor was in a part of the brain that would not adversely affect my memories and who I am and that was what I wanted to hear. When I awoke from the surgery my thought patterns were pretty much the same as when I had been put to sleep. There was only one difference . . . I couldn't communicate, I found it hard to speak even the simplest words. I didn't always say what I meant either. I couldn't even write down what I wanted because the surgery had affected my communication skills. There was nothing wrong with me as far as my thought patterns, I just could not communicate them. Thankfully, Terry could see I was still me in my mind, I did have thoughts, I just couldn't get it to the outside and communicate properly. I know it was very confusing to those of you that had contact with me at this point because I didn't fully understand it myself. I mean since I didn't always say what I meant . . . it could get a little confusing if you didn't pay attention. I kept hoping it would get better and over time . . . it did. In the meantime I was reduced to pointing at pictures of what I wanted and stuttering a few words out that could have no meaning what so ever to do with what it was I wanted. I did remain calm, I knew getting frustrated would only make things worse, so I made a concerted effort not to get frustrated. Believe it or not, I was determined to not allow this to get me down. After all, I had been through so much, how could I let this set back affect me. 

As the days and weeks went by, I soon began to say what I meant with more and more accuracy. Still had a stutter but that was probably the least of my worries, after all, I had brain surgery and was making progress so who could ask for more than that? Well, when I went back to  UVA for a check up at one of my other doctors (the radiation doctor), I noticed that my head was leaking from the stitches that had been put in my head. Now, they had replaced a portion of my skull with a titanium mesh. It appeared that there was fluid gathering around the side of my skull, well, you know, what was left of it. I had some radiation treatments that were scheduled and had one of them at this point. The doctors decided to send me over to the neurosurgeon to have the place where the fluid was gathering checked out. Sooooooo, after several hours in the emergency room there at UVA, they admitted me. Now, I had plans of my own. I mean my friend Jennifer had come in from Nebraska (by the way, it was a surprise to see her) and we were going to spend some time together. It was going to be Jennifer, my friend Lisa and my Mom and we were going to sew, sew, sew till our hearts content. I mean think about it . . . the radiation only takes a few minutes and then we would have the rest of the day to play. Now they had gone and messed up my plans. We had packed the van to do some work and now we weren't going to get to do it. I was soooooo disappointed. After they admitted me, they sent in a doctor who would drain the place on my head, then I could go home . . . OK, so we were making progress and our plans weren't totally ruined. OK, OK, I can handle that. So, after we had the area drained, they let us go and be released from the hospital. Boy was I hungry and I knew just where to go . . . The Wood Grill there in Charlottesville.  This was my favorite place to eat. After waiting on the wheel chair guy to take me down for a few minutes, we decided that we didn't need to have him wheel me down, I could leave on my own and the sooner we left, the sooner I could eat that delicious meal that was waiting for me at The Wood Grill. MMmmmm it was good. While we were there I received a phone call. It was the hospital. Seems that they had released me too soon, there was bacteria in the fluid they had drained off. I would need antibiotics. There go my plans again, down the drain. Shoot and Double Shoot. I can't seem to catch a break. So, I go back to the hospital (not before I ate mind you, I mean they did let me go and all). When I arrived back at the hospital, the nurses gave me the antibiotics using an IV. I was hospitalized all week and so the best laid plans for sewing were foiled. I did have a really nice visit with Jennifer, Lisa and Mom, but it just wasn't the same as the visit would have been if we had gotten to sew. I was sent home and had six weeks of IV antibiotics to follow while resting at home. Jennifer had to go back to Nebraska. Thank goodness we got to visit the time that we did. I can't tell you how touched I was with all the people that contacted me during this time. The Lord is truly Good and Merciful. I can not express the many thanks to those that have contacted me during this time. It is just so over whelming. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, to all of you and you know who you are!!